Bermuda to Azores | Day 14

Life presents you with a myriad of choices—everything from the mundane, like what to have for breakfast, to the momentous, like who to marry. I have made millions of choices throughout my life. Two of the more momentous were marrying Ken and embarking on this grand sailing adventure together.

In sailing, as in life, there are endless decisions to make.

Which way should we sail to best avoid this front—or the next one? The wind is light: what direction and sail configuration will maximize what little we have? The boat is rocking and rolling; what can I possibly make for dinner in these conditions? Sometimes the wind is coming from exactly where we want to go, or directly behind us—what's the best approach? And sometimes you are stuck between two imperfect options. How do you know which to choose?

So often on this journey, we have weighed and re-weighed every factor before us and set our course—only to find ourselves watching other ships on AIS (which shows us vessels within roughly 20 miles), wondering: How is that boat going so fast? How are they sailing so deep downwind? And then the second-guessing begins. Are we bad sailors? Should we be doing something different? Have we made the wrong call? It is hard not to compare yourself to others and question the course you've set.

Sometimes we adjust based on what another sailor is doing. But most of the time, we simply have to chart our own course and go, adjusting as necessary. We don't have the full picture of what those other sailors are experiencing. They are 20 miles to the east, north, or wherever of us. They might have a little more wind, or wind coming at a slightly better angle. Maybe they're motorsailing. Maybe their boat is simply better suited to downwind sailing than ours. We cannot judge our course by someone else's.

That said, we can study what others are doing and try something new. We can ask fellow sailors what they would do in our situation. And we can learn from those ahead of us on the journey—the ones with the wisdom of years and miles under their keel. But at the end of the day, we are in our boat, navigating our own small patch of this vast ocean. We have to make the best possible decision given our specific circumstances, with the knowledge and tools we have, and then set our course and go.

We will make mistakes. There will be things we could have done better. Hopefully, we will have learned valuable lessons along the way—ones that will make us better sailors for the next adventure.

The same is true in life, and the same is true in marriage. Today is our 18th wedding anniversary. Like our sailing adventure, it has been full of everything that marriage brings —ups and downs, tears and laughter, tension and resolution. We do ourselves a disservice when we compare our marriage to others'. We are different people, with different personalities, strengths, and weaknesses. We face different variables and different challenges. We cannot chart our course based on someone else's. The best we can do is weigh all the factors, seek out the wisdom of those who have gone before us, chart our course, and go.

We have made many mistakes over these 18 years. There are countless choices we could have made to be kinder, more patient, more attentive, more supportive. But we have arrived at this place — a little weathered, hopefully a little softened, and with so many stories to tell.

God willing, we will arrive in Horta sometime tomorrow. What a journey it has been.

All is well!

Day Fourteen Stats
Nautical Miles Sailed In The Last 24 Hours 128

Average Boat Speed 5.3kts

Max Boat Speed 7.0kts

GPS Coordinates 37 14.404N 30 26.831W

Miles to go: 120

Last night’s blue moon on my second to last night watch

Monica enjoying last nights sunset

Casual downwind sail